i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
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