I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize