My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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