That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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