Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
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finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
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I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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