My underwear smells like fireworks.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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