just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm getting married
To pizza
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
