I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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