Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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