She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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