How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize