I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
