yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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