and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
