i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
