I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
it was like his penis was on wheels.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
