Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Drake has all the answers
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize