yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize