I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
