never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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