let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
