C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
then he tried to convert me to islam
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize