he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize
