Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
