i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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