No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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