haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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