i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I am available for nakedness
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
