Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
So squirting runs in the family.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
