Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
