I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
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you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
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The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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