But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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