I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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