going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
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