I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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