he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
