whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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