so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
