he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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