I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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