i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize