You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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