first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
