ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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