1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
