What a fucking waste of an outfit
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
