btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
