so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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