I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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