Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize