ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
